Fake Hair = Fake Woman?

The fact that I wear false hair for fun makes me vulnerable to the criticism that I am “fake” or “unnatural” or somehow not loving myself. I’ve not yet encountered the argument that blatantly, but I might someday. I have gotten the odd off-hand comment (usually from men) like “Well I just don’t get why you wear wigs” (translation: I don’t like it that you wear wigs). My response is usually: why do you need to get it? Just don’t wear them then.

Here’s my opinion about that attitude: it’s someone else’s, not mine. People are entitled to their opinions, but it’s all about who they are and has nothing to do with me. I don’t feel fake when I wear wigs. I feel pretty and happy and I’m certainly not hurting anyone by doing it, so the fact someone else might be bothered by it isn’t going to factor into my decision. The bottom line is that our society is ridiculous when it comes to the idea of ‘natural’ beauty. It obviously wants women to be fake because it promotes an unnatural standard; the catch is we’re all supposed to lie about it.

Long hair is pretty, why wait to grow it if you can buy it and put it on your head? It’s the only way you’re likely to get that fabulous head of hair you see on just about every female celebrity in existence, because none of their hair is real either. Don’t like wrinkles and don’t want them? There’s this injection called Botox you can get that will reduce their appearance – it’s offered to you if you want it, but you’d better be damned ashamed of using it. This very conveniently keeps us stuck in a shame spiral – wear wigs or weaves or extensions, acrylic nails, get Botox and facelifts, boob jobs, dye jobs, whatever – but do it all behind a veil of secrecy and shame. Or, don’t do it even if you really think you’d like to because the same society that promotes such enhancements also says you’re trashy, sad, and desperate if you do. Then there’s this sea of judgment swirling around (primarily) women who choose to enhance their appearance with purchased adornments or procedures that assumes we’re brain-dead and incapable of making an independent decision – if you’ve had an eyelift or extensions, you must be a victim of cultural brainwashing, and not simply someone who doesn’t like saggy eyelids.

Well pardon my French – but screw that.

I propose a third option: do it if you want to, and embrace it. This doesn’t mean you have to tell anyone. That choice is up to each individual. But do not embrace the shame. It’s ridiculous and it keeps you from doing what you want to do. Likewise, if you want to shave your head and not your legs, then embrace that too. Do what makes you happy and let other’s opinions stay just that – their opinions. You’ve got one life to life, after all – have some fun.

 

8 thoughts on “Fake Hair = Fake Woman?

  1. This is a huge topic — this could start a discussion group, seriously. I get quite worked up on this one.

    Where would I even begin. If we want to be “natural”, strictly no artifice (because we truly love ourselves as god intended us), we will let our hair grow all over our bodies, stop wearing any makeup, perfume, deodorant. Stop bathing with any products, and do it far less often. We will stop brushing our teeth with fluoride pastes. No more taming or training eyebrows or nose hair. Certainly no toenail clipping. We will stop cooking our food, unless we find it charred, left over from a brush or forest fire, no more jewelry, no shoes, of course.

    In summer, none of us will wear clothing, no matter how fat or skinny or shapeless our bodies look, at any age, including when we are 80.

    And no Viagra.

    I say to these people, don’t evaluate my look at all. I do that. In fact, I don’t want compliments either. Just pay attention to your own eye-boulders.

    • I once dated a guy whose idea of being a “feminist” was to tell me not to wear makeup or shave my legs…um, I think you missed the point dude. 😉 When I had no hair, I didn’t feel like me without it, and the wigs made me feel “real” again. So screw anyone who disagrees!

  2. LOL – this is such an old post, I re-published it but I didn’t think it would show up on people’s feeds! I wrote this years ago and had at some point had switched it to a draft and in re- working the blog I decided to share it again. When I originally posted it, it was on a blog I started for wig-wearers called ‘100% Real.’ LOL. Thanks for your thoughts!

    • That clearly hit a nerve. 😀 We are taking a break from hauling crap up into the attic and both of us look like bag people. We were just laughing at that fact and how sick and tired we are of trying to look good in this infernal furnace that is SoCal, LOL!!!

  3. I am glad you do! The looks you create are quite phenomenally beautiful, intriguing and fascinating! If someone doesn’t get it, too bad for them but find it hard to imagine why anyone would complain.

  4. I too could go on and on about this topic. In fact I did last year on my Weebly blog and it wasn’t received favorably.
    So I won’t belabor the comment. How others feel about you is not important. How you feel about yourself is very important.
    If a wig makes you feel prettier…do it. If Botox makes you feel more beautiful and better about yourself, and you can afford it…do it.
    Who the Hell’s business is it but your own.
    (That’s French? Huh, didn’t know that)

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